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Young Writers Society



Kiss the Damsel 3

by Certainly Love


Chapter 3

Jane found herself running in the rain, her face flushed and looking as though she had been ravished. Fortunately, that was not the case. Before Marcus had a chance to steal a kiss, Jane kicked him upon the shin with much force that it sent him cursing at the top of his lungs. In that moment, Jane ran for dear life. She never felt so insulted and so embarrassed. Jane was furious as she walked through London’s streets and soon she found herself at home.

Walking into her house, Jane’s mother, Rebecca Dorsey, was tending to the dead lilies that were sitting in a vase in the foyer. As soon as her mother turned around, she gasped.

“Oh, my dear child! What on earth happened to you?” She bellowed.

“It is of little consequence. I decided to walk home from the Westinburgh’s dinner party. I---like the rain.”

“Darling, let’s get you out of those wet clothes. You can catch a fever with those on.” Rebecca led Jane upstairs and Jane was still vexed about what transpired not long ago.

“Jane, there must have been some gentlemen there to have escorted you home.”

“They had not noticed my absence. I left un-noticed. I didn’t want them to know.”

“Well, that is certainly rude. You can’t just leave without them acknowledging your departure.” Her mother said in dismay.

“It is a long story, mother. I refuse to speak it.” Jane said as she put on her night trail.

“Should I send a note of regret or apology?”

Jane nodded her head, “I’d appreciate it if you did. I really am tired. It was a long dreadful night.”

Jane slid inside her bed and covered herself. Rebecca looked at her and sighed, “I do hope you are alright.”

“I’m absolutely fine.” Jane tried to smile, but as soon as her mother closed the door, Jane sighed and shook her head. What was she to do when she went out into society? She was sure everyone knew what had just happened. Jane slept terribly that night and all she could think about was how very close she had been to kissing the person she detested the most. Yet, she was left pondering how it would have been.

Marcus was reading the London Newsletter in the dining hall. He had just eaten a whole course of eggs, bacon, ham, and some toast along with a cup of hot coffee. He was quite relaxed and ready to start another good day’s work, but then he had that nagging Jane Dorsey at the back of his mind. He could not fathom what it was about her that he thought about her so. It was probably because she had injured his shin quite badly last evening. If anything, he was more fascinated than he was angry. That, he found very much odd.

Suddenly, Brent entered the room, “My lord, there is someone here to see you. She said it is an emergency.”

“Do send her in.” Marcus raised a brow, curious as to why someone had called so early in the morning.

Marcus then stood as he saw Pamela Westinburgh enter the room. It was quite evident that she was furious because she was red in the face and breathing out fire. Pamela pointed accusingly at him.

“You must be very content with yourself. You have accomplished what you wanted.” She said without greeting him.

“And what, may I ask, is that?”

“Jane is now being spoken about in society. They say that she isn’t worthy enough to kiss someone like you, but what they don’t know is that she ran away---in the rain just to escape it.”

“She kicked me in the shin.”

“And I hope she kicked it hard. You had no right to try and kiss her like that when she had not wanted it. Now she is in bed with a fever and who knows if she’ll catch her death.” Pamela crossed her arms.

“I…You say she isn’t well?”

“No…I’m afraid not. Now, either you send her an apology letter or---”

“Of course. I just had no idea. Is she alright?” Marcus asked eagerly.

“Of course she isn’t! Now why is it that you care all of a sudden?”

“You’re really beginning to bug me.” Marcus threw his towel down.

“She doesn’t want to see you. So if I were you, I’d be wasting my time.”

Marcus had sent Pamela off and headed to Jane’s home to which he found that Pamela was right. Jane had not wanted to see him. Marcus stared the butler in the eye. He was quite determined to knock down the door if he couldn’t see Jane. This was a matter to which he was at fault for in every way. He shouldn’t have attempted to kiss her in the first place.

“With all due respect sir, let me see her or I’ll---”

“Or you’ll what?” Jane’s mother was standing right beside the butler.

“Oh, Mrs. Dorsey, forgive me. I just wanted to see how Jane is faring.”

“She is quite alright, just a little ill. Now what is it that you wanted from her?”

“I wanted to speak with her.” Marcus tipped his hat up and glanced beyond Mrs. Dorsey. Rain had dripped from his hat, “I think I may be the cause for her illness.”

“She says she doesn’t want to see you. So I assume you are Marcus Daniel.” She lifted a brow.

“Yes, I am.”

“What a handsome fellow.”

“W-What does that have to do with anything?”

“Marcus Daniel, if you insist upon seeing my daughter you mustn’t ask so many questions. Do come in before you catch a fever.”

Marcus entered into the house and stood with his hands behind him. He didn’t look at all presentable and Mrs. Dorsey thought it was charming how he went out of his way just to see Jane. Mrs. Dorsey knew that this was going to be quite interesting. So she silently signaled him to go ahead and see her.

“She is upstairs, second door to your left.”

Marcus didn’t hesitate and headed up the stairs to find Jane. As soon as he knocked upon the door, he heard the sound of her voice.

“Oh, who could that possibly---Come in!” She said. She didn’t sound at all ill, but as soon as Marcus entered the room. He saw Jane lying in bed looking as if she had caught her death. She was pale and she looked utterly uncomfortable. Just as Jane saw who her visitor was, she pulled the covers up high above her breasts.

“What could you possibly want now?” She mumbled, not mentioning the fact that she was not presentable enough to be seen.

“I have come to…” He paused, looking her over, “Apologize.”

“For what, the rude comments or the fact that you humiliated me beyond measure?” Again he saw the fire in her eyes and he actually smiled. “Why the devil are you smiling?”

“I’m sorry, it’s just---Miss Dorsey, I am truly sorry for the inconvenience I have caused you.” His expression went back to its solemn state. “Not that it was my fault that you ran in the rain to deliberately catch a fever.”

“Who told you that?” Jane frowned.

“Your beloved friend had taken the liberty to tell me of what had happen to you. I just came to see if what she said was true.”

“Well, you know the truth. Now would you be so kind and leave?”

“Certainly.” Marcus said as he attempted to open the door. “But just know that I am sorry that you are ill, but that doesn’t mean that we are friends.”

“I would be considered a fool to ever admit that you are someone worth befriending.”

“My, my…so very hostile. What, pray tell, makes you so…angry?” Marcus then changed his mind about leaving and sat down upon the chair that was set beside her bed. There was no mistaking the mockery in his eyes.

“Your very presence is what makes me feel so.”

“I could tell. Well, I must say, you look…utterly disastrous.”

“Why thank you for the compliment.”

“Always a pleasure.” Marcus said as he stood up to observe her pictures that lay atop her dresser. A book laid there and he decided to take a look.

“What are you doing?” Jane asked, lifting herself off the bed.

“I am merely just browsing if you don’t mind.”

“I do mind. You have no right to---”

Marcus then gasped mockingly, “What does this say? Dear diary, I am very vexed beyond measure by this man who thinks he could charm any lady in the world. He may be handsome, but I find him utterly impossible.”

In that instant, Jane jumped from her bed and grabbed her diary from his hands. “Get out!” She nearly yelled.

“You think I’m handsome? Why, Miss Dorsey, what a confirmation.” He laughed and Jane was breathing like a mad woman.

“That doesn’t mean anything.” She tried to say.

Marcus looked Jane from top to bottom and found that she looked so fetching in her night trail. Well, she certainly had very nice breast and a very attractive body.

“My, don’t we look dashing in our night trail.”

Jane gasped, realizing that she was not even dressed in an appropriate manner. Immediately Jane wrapped her arms across her breast, furious.

“Once again, get out.”

“Of course.” He then paused, “One day, I will make you fall in love with me like every other woman in all of England. Just you know that.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it. Never will I even think of ever falling in love with the likes of you.”

“Let’s see about that. Good day Miss Dorsey.”

“Good riddance, Mr. Daniel.”

As soon as Marcus closed the door, he smiled. There was nothing more intriguing than hearing her sarcastic remarks. She was a challenge, not to mention, she had the ability to make you stir in your seat. Marcus slowly descended the stair case and Mrs. Rebecca Dorsey was pretending to examine her flowers with much attention.

“Is everything alright?” Rebecca asked.

“Oh yes. Actually, Jane said she was delighted to see me. She wanted to know when we could take a stroll in the park. I agreed that we should take a stroll as soon as she is well.”

“Well, that certainly is a change of heart. I take it that you and Jane are getting along now?”

“Oh yes. If I am not mistaken, I think she is quite taken with me. Don’t you think, Mrs. Dorsey?” Marcus smiled deviously and winked.

Mrs. Dorsey blushed and smiled, “I do sense she is quite smitten by you. You are a very appealing man.”

“Yes I am.” Marcus then kissed Mrs. Dorsey upon the hand, “I thank you for your generosity.”

“Nonsense, I haven’t been so generous lately, but I’ll be sure to invite you to dinner soon.”

“Thank you. And I‘ll be sure to make every visit a delight for you and your daughter.”

With that, Marcus left, feeling so satisfied. In that instant, he felt as though he had accomplished something, but he didn’t quite understand what it was he had accomplished. But he was sure of one thing. He was going to make Jane Dorsey fall in love with him whether she liked it or not.


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111 Reviews


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Sun Mar 30, 2014 7:41 pm
rawrafied wrote a review...



I actually completed this story during a bout of procrastination in class in which I possessed my trusted ipod and wifi. xD Was a nice read that made me feel bubbly inside. I figured review day would be a good chance to finally comment. :3

Jane found herself running in the rain, her face flushed and looking as though she had been ravished.
Nice first sentence. and I loved that you didn't continue DIRECTLY after the last scene from the last chapter. Also, I'm a sucker for the word 'ravished'. xD

It is of little consequence.
Loved this. Very appropriate for the time period.

Here are some corrections/suggestions:
...Jane kicked him upon the shin with much force that...
'Much' and 'that' do not bode well here with just 'force' to separate them.

In that moment, Jane ran for dear life. She never felt so insulted and so embarrassed.
'In that moment' is more used in terms of emotion. I'd suggest omitting it and combining the remnants with the following sentence.

Jane was furious as she walked through London’s streets and soon she found herself at home.
I was always taught to avoid being verbs as much as possible, and this is an occasion where you can do such. You could say 'Jane furiously walked' ect ect.

Rebecca Dorsey, was tending to the dead lilies that were sitting in a vase in the foyer.
I liked this 'dead lilies'. Not sure if intentional, but lilies are commonly used at funerals but are also a symbol of purity and chastity. So it emphasis on this now-to-be rumored kiss being the death of her purity. But on top of that, it acts as foreshadowing by having Rebecca doing the mending and showing that she will do the same with Jane. :D Also, another opportunity to avoid being verbs by writing it as 'Rebecca Dorsey tended to the' ect ect.

I---like the rain.
This was a good way of showing her desire to not speak of the topic. However, although you are correct to use the em dash for interruption, the em dash should only have two dashes, not three.

I'm going to stop here. Hope this was helpful. Happy Review Day! :D






Thanks a bunch! But I should let you know I haven't edited my chapters since high school. Haha Just the first one and two. I think.



rawrafied says...


Lol. I kinda figured since it's dated from 2007. But if you do in the future, hopefully this helps...maybe...no.... x'D





Oh yeah! haha Thanks so much! :)



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Tue May 08, 2007 8:14 pm
Night Mistress says...



this story is getting good.




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Fri Feb 16, 2007 2:20 am
mandylynn16 wrote a review...



I also love this story. It is romance with a similisr plot to others I have read in my extensive past, but the element that I appreciate most is that even though it follows a recognizable plot-line, it is so very unique in its own way. The story is intriguingly compelling and I enjoy reading it. I do belive it is worthy of being published for more eyes to enjoy!!




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Sun Dec 10, 2006 6:48 am
falling in love says...



This is absolutely killing me cuz it's so much like one of the stories I am writing. Can't wait to read more. No crit.




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Thu Nov 02, 2006 3:49 am
Certainly Love says...



PLease This, story needs attention!




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Thu Oct 19, 2006 12:29 am
Karma says...



it is vair vair gutt!




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Wed Oct 18, 2006 5:34 am
Wiggy says...



I love this story! Keep posting! :D





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